Another week, not much better...
The battle goes on. GP (different one than last week) is on
holiday til Friday so I cant see him, still no reply or contact from the
Clinic, don’t know how to find a private psychiatrist, I’ll ask the
psychologist if he can recommend anyone to see. I really need someone to talk
to to help get this calmed down now, its been the longest ‘episode’ ive had in
ages this, I feel absolutely spannered, head feels like ist boiling over and
ive got nowt to help. The voices are telling me to hurt myself more and more,
and worse. Cant give in to them. Don’t like waiting for anything at the best of
times, even more when its this important. Again its a case of no one listening.
Rang Mind in the town and he gave me a number for PALS who can help change
psychiatrist but im not rining them yet until I hear from the clinic. God knows
whats happening. Theres ‘people’ and big dog/wild cat like animals everywhere I
seem to look and im sitting here on my own. Probably need to get out of here.
Walk somewhere or summit, Water seems to clam me down sometimes. Seafront.
Fucking god knars. Can’t concentrate or owt, everything is git jumbled up and
fast. Used to get diazepam and temazepam and shit to sort me out, didn’t help that much but better
than nowt. Dunno if I can last til Friday with all this noise and paranoia like, hopefully something will develop before then.
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